Warai kata's Adam and Eve
by warai kata
Summary: A unique twist on the "tale" of Adam and Eve. Starring Lilith as The Feminist.


^__________^kata's

Adam and Eve

**Many, many, many, many, many…etc years ago, the man named God (from Godalus Mann) created two little min people (to him) and he called them humans. **

** Why did he create them? He wanted to expand his planet that he called Earth, by propagating it with is new invention, the human. It was also part of a friendly competition with one of his friends, named Izanagi, who was also creating humans on another part of the earth. Earth was a giant planet, God couldn't fill it up himself. **

** So, his first creation was a man, like him, called Adam. He placed him in a closed refuge called Eden. Adam liked Eden, but for a long time he thought it was his name, and God had to keep reminding him that his name was **_**Adam**_**. Not Eden. **

** Adam was a young, strong man. At least in his early 20's or something. His hair was medium brown and his eyes were blue like the sky. But he didn't know that. God had to teach him everything personally, and it took a lot of time. **

** But soon Adam had enough sense to explore Eden without God telling him what everything was. **

** Adam had a fun time chasing things, like bunnies and deer. But he always seemed to get their names confused. There were times he would tell God that he almost caught a deer that day when it was actually a bunny. God would sigh in mild disappointment. **

** As time passed, maybe half a year, God soon stopped visiting Adam and the boy was left to entertain himself. **

** But then, he heard noise in the bushes one day and went over to see what it was. When he saw what was moving around in the bushes, he was confused. **

** It was girl, not that much younger than him with shiny black hair and emerald eyes. She seemed very surprised to see him as he was her. **

** "Who are you?!" Adam asked, trying to hide his fear and confusion. **

** "Lilith." The girl answered, standing up, very confused. **

** "…Adam." Adam said. Lilith blinked. **

** "…You?" she asked. Adam nodded, she was smart. Whatever she was. **

** "How did you get here?" he asked her. **

** "I think some giant man placed me here." Lilith informed him. **

** "…This is my land." Adam told her. Lilith blinked. **

** "No it isn't." she said. Adam looked at her in shock. **

** "Yes, it is." Adam informed her. Lilith raised an eyebrow. Then Adam began to eye her some more. Lilith backed away a little. **

** "What are you doing?" she asked. **

** "**_**What**_** are you?" he asked. **

** "Stop examining me, I'm whatever you are just without that ugly thing down there." Lilith told him, feeling violated. Adam then looked down at his dangly thing. **

** "Did yours get cut off?" he asked. **

** "I never had one." Lilith told him, insulted. Then she began to walk away, but Adam followed her. **

** And after some good time of walking, Lilith turned around and noticed that he was still following her. **

** "How is your hair black?" Adam asked. **

** "I was made like this." Lilith answered. Adam looked around, feeling unwanted. "…What is it?" Lilith asked, confused. Adam sighed. **

** "I think you're very pretty." He told her shyly. Lilith blinked, confused. She even blushed a little. **

** "Even without the things you have?" she asked. Adam nodded. **

** "Will you go exploring with me?" he asked her. **

** "…I don't get what you're trying to say. So no." Lilith told him. Adam looked down. But then he looked at her and smiled. **

** "Then I'll explain." He told her happily. And so, he began this little song to the tune of Hakuna Matata:**

_**Oh lady called Lilith, we're not in a maze**_

_** Oh lady called Lilith, you're starting to make me feel crazed…**_

_**You mean my worries are now thrown in the hay**_

_** You're my problem-free, and dancin' free**_

_** Oh lady called Lilith…**_

_** "What? Lady called Lilith?" **_

_** "Yes, it's my grotto!"**_

_** "What's a grotto?"**_

_** "And don't know, but look there's a grotto for you!"**_

_** "???" **_

_** "While he was a young little mog!!!"**_

_** When I was a young little mog!**_

_** "God?"**_

_** "Yes, it's me." **_

_** He found a pirhana, but it started to peel **_

_** So like a little girl it made him squeal…**_

_** And it burnt when the fish always thought they could win!**_

_** And oh the pain!**_

_** Thought of playing a new game!**_

_** And there was once I farted!**_

_** And did you squeal!**_

_** Yes, everytime that I…!**_

_** "No, Adam, not in front of the lady."**_

_** "…Sorry."**_

_** Oh lady called Lilith we're not in a maze**_

_** Oh lady called Lilith you're starting to make me feel crazed!**_

_** You mean my worries are now thrown in the hay**_

_** "Yeah, swing it girl!"**_

_** You're my problem-free, and dancin' free**_

_** Oh lady called Lilith**_

_** (music)**_

_** Oh lady called Lilith**_

_** Oh lady called Lilith**_

_** Oh lady called Lilith**_

_** You mean my worries are now thrown in the hay**_

_** You're my problem-free, and dancin' free**_

_** Oh lady called Lilith**_

_** Oh lady called Lilith**_

_** Oh lady called Lilith **_

_** Oh lady called Lilith**_

_** Oh lady called Lilith…**_

And so, time passed with Lilith being Adam's bride. They were generally very happy together, excluding a few bad things that come with it. But those aren't that bad.

**Things with them soon became daily. They had built a house, and got things to put in the house and all that. Like a bed, fridge, tables, TV, computer…all that good stuff. They both loved their lives. It was nice. **

**God would sometimes come over to see how things were going, and sometimes he would annoy Lilith just for fun. But she always wasn't in the mood for his games. **

**But things weren't how everyone had expected. Lilith was usually stuck cleaning the house everyday, and she didn't think it was all fun and cute like Adam and God did, who were just lazy. Lilith wanted to do a few things like they did, but whenever she said something about it, Adam would just get all defensive and turn himself into the victim. This annoyed Lilith a lot. What if she wanted to go buy things and go out to places? What if she just wanted some air out of the house?! What if she wanted to make friends of the angels like they did and stuff?! **

**And then, one night, Lilith was at home, cleaning and stuff. She sighed a tired sigh. And then she looked at the clock. Her eyes widened in shock and worry. **

**Where was Adam? He was usually here by now. Lilith then put the cleaning stuff away and then walked outside. She then decided to go deeper into the forest. **

** Not too far away, Adam and his dad had gotten drunk. They had been out partying with the angels and having a fun time. What Adam didn't know, was that while he had been drinking, something had just got away from him. **

** So, as he and his dad, God, headed back home, Adam looked around in confusion. There was singing. And it sounded very pretty. Maybe it was Lilith wanting to make some babies or something. **

** Adam then headed closer to the singing. What was it? Who was it? Was it an angel? Was it Kasiel??? No! It couldn't be. She wasn't the type to just sing in the forest. Only bad girls sang in the forest, and Kasiel was a very good girl. Plus, she was still thought of as a kid. So, no. That would be wrong of him to think she was singing in that pretty, pretty, voice. **

**Song in tune to Silent Night;**

_**Violent Right Hole-y Fight**_

_** Violent Right Hole-y Fight **_

_** All is wrong**_

_** All is might**_

_** Round young pigeons, hunger and wild**_

_** Strom-bolli is so slender says child**_

_** Weep in seventy fleece**_

_** Weep in seventy fleece**_

_** Violent Right Hole-y Fight**_

_** Violent Right Hole-y Fight**_

_** Lepers shake at the sight**_

_** Whories streak from eleven a star**_

_** Seventy boats ring "Hello to ya"**_

_** Mice the Rancor is torn**_

_** Mice the Rancor is torn. **_

_** Violent Right Hole-y Fight**_

_** Violent Right Hole-y Fight **_

_** One of God, who's so right**_

_** Gradient screams from my woolly face**_

_** With the yawn of a scheming taste**_

_** Mesus, a hoard at my worth**_

_** Mesus a hoard at my worth**_

Adam was shocked when he came to the shocking sight! It was a young girl! And she wasn't actually that much younger than himself and Lilith.

** "Who are you?" he asked, still semi-drunk. **

** "Eve." She answered. Her hair was blond, and her eyes were brown. She was very angelic. **

** "I-I'm A-A-Adam." Adam stammered, still in shock. Eve giggled a little. **

** "You're funny." She smiled. **

** "Yes…And I'm also married." He informed her. Eve just smiled. **

** "Okay. I work at the club." She informed him. Then she was thoughtful. "And actually, you made me." She pointed out. "While you were drinking." **

** "With Lilith?!" Adam asked in confusion. "You're my daughter!?" **

** "No," Eve said while giggling. "It just happened." **

** "Lilith made a baby without telling me?!" Adam asked, still not believing what was happening. Eve shook her head. **

** "No, stupid. I came from **_**you**_**." She reminded him. **

** "You have a very pretty voice." Adam told her with a drunk smile. **

** "You flatter me odd man." Eve said, blushing. "I forget your name." She told him, embarrassed. **

** "Adam." Adam repeated from before. "Can I ask something of you? You know, since my wife won't…you know…do it?" he asked. Eve blinked in confusion. **

** "Okay, I'll do what you want. It just can't be stupid." She told him happily. Adam smiled proudly. **

** "I will now attempt to seduce you." He told her. Eve looked at him as if he was stupid. **

** As Lilith looked around for her excuse for her husband called Adam, she ran into his dad. **

** "Do you know where Adam is?" Lilith asked him tiredly. She had been looking around for most of the night. **

** "Not a clue." God told her, getting up off the ground. Lilith sighed. **

** "He usually goes with you out drinking, does he not?" she asked hopefully with worry in her voice. God looked at her condescendingly. **

** "Are you implying that my Adam is not up to your standards?" he asked her sternly, but also still drunkly. Lilith blinked. **

** "…No, I just want to find him." She told him. "He needs to come home now. He's been doing this for too long now!" **

** "Adam can do no wrong!" God said with hurt in his voice. **

** "Everyone can do wrong, even him! I just need help looking for him! Help me!" Lilith told him desperately. **

** "No Lilith!" God snapped, hurt. Lilith backed away from the drunk god in shock and confusion. **

** "What?!" she asked. **

** "I said no." God told her. **

** To tune to Noel: (Adam and Eve)**

_**The worst fennel, the rangers did pay**_

_** Was to put on poor lepers in wheels where they say**_

_** In wheels where they lay weeping on sheets**_

_** On a bold splinter's fight that was so deep**_

_** Fennel, fennel, fennel, fennel, **_

_** Torn is the ring of Gabriel**_

_** May cooked up to thaw a star**_

_** Whining in the feast, go blonde then scar**_

_** And to hearth it saved a fake bike**_

_** And so it spit-n'-spewed both rays of light**_

_** Fennel, fennel, fennel, fennel,**_

_** Torn in the ring of Gabriel**_

_** This scar knew high to the forth-fest**_

_** Pour rest-n-scam and so to take it's best**_

_** And where it did cough and say**_

_** "Might over the face there, Mesus stay"**_

_** Fennel, fennel, fennel, fennel,**_

_** Torn is the ring of Gabriel**_

_** And by the fight of that lame scar**_

_** Free Mice wrens came from nut-tree far**_

_** To sleek over things was their adamant**_

_** And to swallow a scar whenever it spent…**_

_** Fennel, fennel, fennel, fennel, **_

_** Torn is the ring of Gabriel.**_

Adam and Eve laughed happily as their song attracted guests.

** But, sadly, for our heroine Lilith, that Adam had strongly sang for before, was now being sent to hell by Adam's dad, God. **

** Lilith would never be forgotten. Her individuality would be strong in people of the future. Specifically ladies like herself. **

** But, for Adam and Eve, their problems were only beginning. **

** Sad for them Lilith wouldn't be there to assist them with her senses and all her strengths! **

End 


End file.
